Life is Not That Hard
In the past month, I’ve achieved very little in terms of tech and coding knowledge. However, I’d like to share some personal realizations about my experiences living in Singapore, working in AI, and navigating life as a single lady.
I graduated with a master’s degree in AI a year ago from a common school without any outstanding performance. I found a job without joining a code test. Although it felt strange and lucky, it was my best option given the limited opportunities available under visa requirements.
Even now, almost 11 months into my job, I feel like I’m just passing time with minimal productivity with unspoken understanding among colleagues. This has led me to question what the future will look like if I don’t prepare for it. Beyond working, I’ve been contemplating what else I’m capable of doing, such as pursuing caligraphy, sports or volunteering. It’s the biggest challenge I face because the life direction is so different from what I’ve experienced in the past.
Growing up in China, where academic tests were emphasized, I was taught to work hard and achieve top scores. Naturlly I got the top three ranking on most of academic tests. When I was in university, people think it is a symbol to be able to find a good job with high pay and no overtime, and have a life what we want. However, thinking of my college classmates who are in China now, it’s evident that life did not come as it supposed to do. They are still facing too much social networks, endless work demand and continue to fight for high expectations from society or themselves.
I was advised to prepare for the future for a long time, but the reality of future is uncertain that we are not able to touch today. Instead of solely focusing on that fairyland, maybe we need to consider what we can do to enhance present lives, and feel secure or self-confident for what we are now. It’s essential to recognize that it’s we that are responsible for our lives, whether it is consciously chosen to be or not. Perhaps part of our anxiety is from not material, but rather existential and spiritual. We are not lacking in opportunities or time, but we don’t always know what to keep or give up.
In closing, I’d like to leave you with a quote from “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck”: “You and everyone you know are going to be dead soon. And in the short amount of time between here and there, you have a limited amount of fucks to give. Very few, in fact. And if you go around giving a fuck about everything and everyone without conscious thought or choice—well, then you’re going to get fucked.”
